Do Fries Come with that Shake Baby? Ummm No :/

I believe when you see me, you see my weight, but you don't see it. Like you know I'm a big girl, but there's just so much to me as a person that you don't see it. And while I love my family and friends who to this day (lol) insist I am not fat. Thank you guys, lol you guys def help me keep my head up. I love their support and belief in the things I do, my aspirations, my goals and me as a person, but I think an other kind of support now.

I don't go shopping for clothes often, for many reasons that aren't related to my weight at all. But when I do, it's like I miss the world memo of when to buy clothes that day, because when I go, EVERYTHING IN MY SIZE IS GONE! WTF?! There must be more fattys out there, at least more than I realize. So by the end of my shopping experience, I am normally feeling frustrated, upset, mad, like I want to cry, but most importantly I WANT TO CHANGE!

I am tired of working out and sticking to it and because of so many other things, I have to stop and focus on other things. Its a little sad because the people that love me know that food is def 1 of the keys to my soul, you cook for me I'm in love, but poor eating habits and not eating the right things are taking a toll.

I hoped that if I read some "fat girl" books, I'd feel inspired to lose weight. If I thought about my high blood pressure and possible future health complications, then I'd be more motivated to lose weight. And I do, but that's short lived due to my crazy life. I need this change to be permanent! I need a strong support system for this, I need your help to help me get there.

So as I take my last bite of a greasy, melt in your mouth artery clogging goodness along with the last of the amazingly salty high blood pressure booster fries, I am vowing to do the best I can to lose some and live a healthier lifestyle

It's just so sad...

I've been having a family situation that has really opened up my eyes to what's really going on. I see and feel the consequences of people's actions, both good and bad. And the bad ones, they make me sooo sad. When something bad happens, there is pain and suffering on both sides, no one wins. Given the situation I'm in, I try not to judge others, I try to take what I visually and audibly consume and process it, but try not to analyze it. I try to let be what is and try to move on to something that leads to positivity * yea I think I just made up a new word, but it makes sense right?* And while I should be doing homework, homework is what brought me here, and my current situation is what fuels me for everything. So I'm not sure if I unknowingly manipulated things to fit into a way for me to relate or catch my interest or if it just happened to be here, a friend says it was always there, I just never had a need to look into it or see it because I didn't know it. Anyway here I am making a mental connection between my current situation and homework. But I guess that's how you learn right? Take what you learn in class and apply it to real life.

My homework assignment is to find 3 current events each week and develop a simple objective question to them and give a truthful factual answer to it. I try to find stories more so in print, but more importantly I try to find stories that wouldn't be on the front page. I try to find the stories I think my fellow classmates would not have even looked at in their google searches. So today I came across a story about how the U.S. prison system will be taking away, inmates who are sentenced to lethal injection, request to have a final meal. I'm not sure what reasons gave away to this decision, I'm sure it boils down to one individual who, for lack of better words, fucked it up for everyone else. But thats not the main point. After reading that article, I googled lethal injections, and I read Wiki's articles on it. I then read about recent "hot topic" cases that involved lethal injection. I read about their last meal requests, their convictions and the affects their cases had on other people. I was just in an awe at lethal injections and the fact that we put soooo must trust in our legal system when everything seems biased, AND IM AMAZED AT THE FACT THAT according to the media, it seems like some people just "click" the wrong way, and BOOM we have a rapist, a terrorist, a murderer, a robber, a no good to society. Thinking about it made me feel incredibly sad, so I went back to my homework. However, sadness wasn't done with me yet. I was looking for a local headlining story when I came across a story of a young man, who was a gang banger looking for another rival gang. This gang member was with a couple of other members just cursing around the neighborhood when they found this one kid who was walking from his girlfriend's house. One gang member shouted out to this kid what he repped, and when he got no reply, the gang member came out with a metal bat and beat the kid senseless. The gang member then took the kid's phone, called the kid's girlfriend and told her what he had just done proudly, then left the kid on the side of the street. The gang member is now in county with no bail and the kid is still in a coma. BUT ITS LIKE WTF!? Do we really have this many people out there who just have nothing else to do but to be stupid? Do we really have this many lawyers and judges who could careless? Do we really have jail and prison systems overcrowding just so someone can get paid? Is there no hope?

All of this just makes me sick! I really hope that the things I'm doing now will better my future and make people happy. I hope that the kids that I teach will learn something positive and FEEL it! I hope that what I can teach them keeps them off the streets, out of harm's way so that we can live in a society where we aren't hurting others because of their skin color, what they wear, because we are mad or lonely. What I ultimately want is for no one to go through the pain of losing someone to jail, drugs, diseases, sex, and violence. If someone is meant to go, let the man upstairs take care of it, don't take it into your hands to play God.

I think this song sums up perfectly how I feel....AMEN

Aren't You a Little Stinker :P

Hmm, well before I had a lil scare with my kitty, Lieben, I was totally prepared to give this full figured speech/blog...splog? Naw guess not, but anyway I was prepared to lay it all on the line going full speed to Dickhead-ville. My adrenaline has taken my firey punch away...well some of it, but I'm still gonna put this out there. Now, I'm going try to make this short,possibly sweet and simple because this pretty little lady has gotta be up for class tomorrow morning, but nevertheless, this has to be said. Sooooooo on one of my social networking sites, my current status is "I stand corrected guys, still SMH. I try to be nice but I can't help it if you're a douchebag...sry LOL" I know it sounds a little harsh and yeah I'm no Miss Universe, but still....really guys? I can't tell you how exhausting it is for a guy to start talking to you, and your "THIS GUY IS THIRSTY FOR PUSSY!!!" meter goes off....umm I think theres another word for that....oh yeah, a woman's intuition. Anyways, call it what you want, but a red flag raises up on your end and now you're stuck talking to a guy that can't get his dick wet even if he drooled on it. At this point your face is like
<------- FML

So then he goes off telling you how he doesn't want friends with benefits, he wants a real girl (Sorry Pinocchio). Then he goes off saying how he just wants someone to be serious with, and all this blah blah blah blah blah. What it all translates into is "Nawwwww Cowardly Lion, you won't get a heart, but follow the yellow brick road anyway down to my City of Oz." And the funny part is he thinks that if he tells you he wants a "relationship", "something serious", that you'll be like "awww sooo sweet! He's too much of a gentleman to want anything sexually, he just wants live out the lyrics to Katy Perry's Teenage Dream, which OMG! IS MY FAVORITE SONG EVAR!" Omg and here's the best part, even though you both go back and forth on the subject of what is left of a relationship if all you have is sex, and he insists that what you're saying isn't true, he then finally ends the convo saying "everything leads to sex and thats what I WANT!" Then he starts to macho man himself up by saying that the reason you're not a sex enthusiast (like him) is because you haven't had sex with him, that you don't know what "a man feels like", that hes "top notch" and "never fails." WTF IS THIS? A CHEVY COMMERCIAL FROM BACK IN THE DAY WHEN THEY USED THE SONG "LIKE A ROCK"? ha lol pun intended!

At that point you want to just agree to disagree, BUT YOU CAN'T! Nooooooo Lassy! As an educated woman who won't stand for such objectifying and lies YOU MUST TELL HIM HOW IT IS, YOU MUST HOLD UP THAT MIRROR AND LET HIM KNOW HE'S NO *insert you vibrator's pet name* AND HE ISN'T NEARLY AS GOOD AS YOUR BLUE DOLPHIN!!! Once you do so, he will reply in some misogynistic manner like "FUCK U BITCH", "YOU'RE UGLY AND FAT" or both if you really pissed him off. Or he may just say "wow BYE", like that's suppose to hurt you. By then you should be LAUGHING YOUR FUCKING ASS OFF because not only did catch on to him quick, you shoved his words back in his face, and because he will probably have to rub one out. His behavior is one of a serious matter because to the infected person, the side effects are dormant ( not visible), but to you that mofo REEKS of Summer's Eve....its a little something I like to call ULTRA MEGA DOUCHEBAG SYNDROME! Now this infectious disease will get you regardless if you're wearing Ed Hardy or not, bronzed up or pale, wearing sunglasses in the club or a neck brace. It's totally color blind and not at all discriminate towards its potential carrier. So here's to you douchebag :)

By the way, I read this in a book called "I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell" - Tucker Max, I'm pretty sure his misogynistic friend said it

"If it lacks a price, it is probably worthless"

Just an FYI

Enjoy the music douchebag :P