Lately life hasn't been feeling very festive like it normally does, and I think it has to do with 1) I'm not a kid anymore and that holiday excitement has lost that luster and 2)well the obvious, that there are some people in my life that I am not with anymore. But that 2nd reason is the exact reason to why I am so thankful. I realize that a year ago, I had a lot in my life that I took for granted. I had a best friend that while I spent almost every waking moment with, it never occurred to me that one day I may not have that. That's not to say that I didn't enjoy our awesome friendship or make a bunch of memorable memories with her, CAUSE I DID! I guess I just thought that this day where it wouldn't be her and I wouldn't come and certainly not so fast. I miss her everyday and even though we don't talk as often as we did, and I haven't seen her in like half a year, I LOVE HER LIKE SHE WAS JUST A BUS RIDE AWAY :) But now that I'm not spending a thanksgiving with her, it makes me a little sad, but it makes me appreciate the time that I did spend with her and the awesome memories, pictures and videos I have of us together.
Next there's my brother who, once we both became teenagers, we kind of went out our separate ways. Thinking back to a year ago, my brother and I would eat so much at thanksgiving, and of course he would finish before me. But because I blocked his way out of his seat, he had to wait for me to finish. Then I would clear my place and head upstairs to fall asleep to Jeff Dunahm's Christmas, hog the remote, and take over the sofa. *laughs to myself* I wouldn't share the sofa, I'd tell him to sit in the chair or on the floor, but then when my back began to hurt, I'd roll on the floor and he'd be there to quickly take my spot on the sofa. We would often bicker about what to watch on TV and idk, I always seemed to win that one, but we would switch off on channels. Eventually mom would come upstairs, find us still like fat slugs digesting our food, and she'd tell us to come downstairs for dessert. Then there was always X-mas shopping. Of course my brother and I would bicker about who was going to wait in the warm car first. At the end of the whole thanksgiving festivities, I'd be frustrated from the crowds, and still fat from the food , and like I'd want my space from my family for a couple hours, but I wouldn't change a single thanksgiving that has passed. I wouldn't take back the bickering, the arguments, the headaches, the laughs, the memories, the jokes or anything because those are the things that makes my thanksgivings so memorable. I obviously can't be with my brother this year, but that doesn't mean I don't think of him every minute of the day, that I don't miss him, or stop loving him. In reality, I think of him every second my mind is free to think, I miss him and love him as much as I possibly can in respect to our situation. I just want him to know that I look forward to thanksgivings with him again soon and that I love him very much!
No comments:
Post a Comment