Why Don't You Love Me?

I was doing my Poetry homework when I realized something and I just had to be like fuck it, I'M BLOGGIN! So here I am.

So I've been thinking about it, and while I was happy past found me the other day...I've come to notice that past only wants me as much as past talks...which doesn't seem to be very much. So it leaves me to think...past do you really need me like you said you did and do? Do you really want me like you said you did and do? Do you really want a present and future with me like you say you do? I don't know about you past...Not to sound conceited or anything but if you really wanted me that much, why don't you fight for it? Why must I question it out of you? The only thing you have over present is a history with me...that's it.Ugh I told myself I wasn't going to be here again...again like this...wanting you, waiting for you, bending at your will, putting myself out there while you just sit there relaxing. Past you told me that you took me for granted and yet that's all you seem to be doing...all over again. You commit yourself to everything else but the thought of me. This song sums it up perfectly

Why Don't You Love Me - Beyonce

Now, now, now, honey
You better sit down and look around
Cause you must've bumped yo' head
And I love you enough to talk some sense back into you, baby
I'd hate to see you come home, me the kids
And the dog is gone
Check my credentials...
I give you everything you want everything you need
Even your friends say I'm a good woman
All I need to know is why?

Why don't you love me?
Tell me, baby, why don't you love me
When I make me so damn easy to love?
And why don't you need me?
Tell me, baby, why don't you need me
When I make me so damn easy to need?

I got beauty, I got class
I got style, and I got @ss
And you don't even care to care
Looka here
I even put money in the bank account
Don't have to ask no one to help me out
You don't even notice that

Why don't you love me?
Tell me, baby, why don't you love me
When I make me so damn easy to love?
Why don't you need me?
Tell me, baby, why don't you need me
When I make me so damn easy to need?

I got beauty, I got heart
Keep my head in them books, I'm sharp
But you don't care to know I'm smart
Now, now now now now now now
I got moves in your bedroom
Keep you happy with the nasty things I do
But you don't seem to be in tune
Ooh.....

Why don't you love me?
Tell me, baby, why don't you love me
When I make me so damn easy to love?
Why don't you need me?
Tell me, baby, why don't you need me
When I make me so damn easy to need?

There's nothing not to love about me
No, no, there's nothing not to love about me
I'm lovely
There's nothing not to need about me
No, no, there's nothing not to need about me
Maybe you're just not the one
Or maybe you're just plain....... DUMB

Cause I Want U ( Maybe)

Well before I begin, I just wanted to update you on my bridges. Shortly after writing that, I stood at the edge of where those burnt bridges once stood, I looked down at their remains and talked to them. I told them that I hoped all was well even though I couldn't walk over them...and I wished that with total sincerity. They responded by echoing back what I had told them. It looks like quite a few of these bridges could possibly be rebuilt again...

1st Bridge (Little Italy Blvd) = Echoed back, building in other places...may not get rebuilt

2nd bridge (Green St) - Echoed back, building in other places, can possibly be rebuilt

3rd bridge (Memorial Drive)Hasn't echoed back...still waiting

4th bridge (Commons Parkway) Echoed back before I even realized it echoed back, is being rebuilt, still pending walk-ability

So now I guess my question is...can these bridges really be rebuilt from scratch, glued together with pieces left in the rubble or am I just trying to yell across to the other side?

Now to the initial reason for my blogging

So the past sometimes has its funny way of finding you later down the road and making itself into the present. Sometimes it even has the intention of becoming the future. And the funny thing about the past is, you never ever forget it...you carry it everywhere with you, even when you think you've left it somewhere. At least that's what I think.

So with that said, past has come back to me and our meeting was a bit of a shock/surprise to both of us, but I'm glad that it turned out to be good and happy one. While talking to past, I've come to learn that past isn't living in the past anymore, but living in a present that isn't too much different from the past. As past and I converse...questions are answered, explanations are told and become clear, memories are reminisced, smiles smile, and laughs laugh. As past and I continue conversating, I remember why past and I were so good together and why to this day, I still love it. But things have changed since past last saw me, I've grown up a little bit...I'm just a little different now...but somethings about me haven't and that's what pulls past and I back...at least that's what I think. I'm not sure if past, which is now present will turn into future...but I like where it's at now.

Here's to bridges and to past because you found me
but most importantly, to you past....cause I Want U

Why Do U Gotta B Like That?

and Unfortunately this is not a happy blog





I just don't fucking understand you and why you do the things you do.Seriously, do you really think I'm telling you things because I want to be a bitch and piss you off? Because I'm not happy until I know I'm being a pain in your ass? Because I have nothing better to do? Well if that's what you think, THEN YOUR SOOOOOO FUCKING WRONG!

I tell you these things to avoid problems
Avoid aggravation
&
Avoid being upset

I don't know what it is with you. You seem to do what you want to do and not think of anyone else but yourself
And the funny thing is you're sooo use to relying on the excuse that you don't know any better or that you're stupid, that now you don't even do the right thing....barely any way
I just wish you would grown up and stop acting like a little kid
When the fact is you know you're not a little kid
You can do so much on your own but you're too lazy to do it
so you try to take shortcuts for everything
UGHHHHHHHHHH!
I can't speak for anyone but myself on this one but YOU ARE NOT STUPID
YOU JUST DO STUPID THINGS ALL THE TIME
AND THAT MAKES YOU LOOK STUPID

When will you realize we won't always be here to help you and get you out of trouble???
When will you realize that???
Hopefully its not too late...